I often find myself having a lesson on the subject of happiness, and what seems to me to be too clear now is that there are seven habits that chronic unhappy develop.
If this is true, and it is, then there is hope for everyone. There are billions of people on our planet, and of course, there are those who are happy. We bounce back and forth between happiness and unhappiness, depending on the days.
Over the years I could see the existence of some features and common habits commonly acquired by the chronic unhappy. However, before you follow me, let me make a small premise to say that: everyone is in charge of bad days, or even weeks when we end up falling into all seven categories.
The difference between a happy and unhappy life lies in how often and how long we remain.
Here are the 7 habits of the chronic unhappy …
1. Your default is that life is tough
Happy people know that life can sometimes be tough, and in difficult times tends to swing between curiosity and victims. You assume your responsibility for being in a certain situation, and focus on how to get out of it as soon as possible.
Perseverance in solving problems, instead of complaining of adverse circumstances, is one of the symptoms of a happy person. The unhappy person tends to perceive himself as a victim of one’s life, and is limited to an attitude of the kind “looks like I happened to” rather than looking for a way out.
2. You are convinced that most people cannot be trusted
I do not mind that a bit of discernment is important, but it’s true that most of the happy people trust their neighbor. With the conviction that there is good in people, and not foregoing that everyone is trying to cheat on you. Happy people, usually open and friendly to those who encounter, create a sense of community around themselves, and welcomes new open-minded knowledge.
Unhappy people are distrustful to most of those they meet, and they automatically assume that foreigners cannot trust. For their misfortune, this kind of behavior makes it possible to slowly close any link outside of their own inner circle, hurting every chance of meeting new friends.
3. You focus on what is not in the world, rather than on what’s fine
In the world there is a lot that does not go, there is no doubt about it, and yet unhappy people are blind to what is really good in the world, focusing on what is wrong. You see them a mile away, they are those who complain, reacting to every positive lapel with a “good, though”.
Happy people are well aware of global issues, but counterbalance their concerns by finding out how good they are. I like to call it both eyes open. The unhappy ones close one in front of all that is good, in fear of distracting them from what is wrong. Happy people put things in perspective. They are aware that this world has its problems, but they do not lose sight of what’s fine.
4. Compared to the others, coves envy
Unhappy people feel that the well-being of their loved ones has their own. They are convinced that there is not enough for everyone, and they constantly confront their luck with that of others. What leads to envy and resentment.
Happy people know that the good fortune and good opportunities of others are nothing more than a demonstration of what one can really aspire to. Happy people know that their fingerprints can never be duplicated or subtracted – from any human being on the planet. They are convinced that their chances are unlimited, and they do not end up in hiding in the thought that in one’s life someone’s goodwill obscure theirs.
5. You try to keep your whole life under control
There is a difference between keeping things under control and striving to achieve their goals. Happy people take daily steps to reach them, but he knows that there is little to be checked in the face of life.
The unhappy tend to administer every detail, striving to foresee any possible consequence, but when life puts the sticks between the wheels, they end up falling flat. The happy people are equally capable of focusing, while being able to follow the flow, and not to collapse when life pulls a low shot.
Juice in this case is trying to focus on the goals and stay focused, but also to be able to accept the merit when it rains without dropping if its meticulous programs go to the air – because that’s how it works. Following the flow is not the plane B of the happy people.
6. Look at the future with a mix of worry and fear
The space in your mind is not infinite. Unhappy people fill him with thoughts on what might go wrong, and not with what might go in the right direction.
Happy people accept disappointments when they arrive, but they allow themselves to dream day by day what they would like to be able to expect from life. Unhappy people fill that same space with a constant sense of concern and fear.
Even happy people experience fears and concerns, but make an important distinction between perceiving and experiencing them. When fear or concern comes to their head, they wonder if it is possible to do something to prevent them (and here we go back to the concept of responsibility), and they do. Otherwise, they realize they’ve fallen into a whirlwind of fear, and let it go.
7. Fill your gossip conversations and complaints
Unhappy people prefer to live in the past. What happened to him, the difficulties that he encountered: these are their favorite arguments. And when they have nothing to say, they focus on the lives of others, and they start to scoff.
Happy people live in the present and dream of the future. Their positive vibrations are felt by the other head of the room. He is enthusiastic about something he is working on, grateful for what he has, and dreams about what life could bring to him.
Obviously none of us is perfect. Sometimes it happens that you dive into the waters of negativity, but what matters is how much it gets soothed and how quickly it reappears. What distinguishes the happy people from the unhappy is a daily practice of positive habits, not doing everything perfectly.
Walk, fall, raise, repeat it! It is the time when you get up to make the difference.
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